That One Time when my Friend almost Disowned Me. (Or: "Who Let the Drama Fanatics Loose?")

Spoiler alert!
                 It's me. I'm the spoiler.
In fact, I'd go as far as to call myself a Ruiner. A ruiner of friendships.

yesterday, because I was so wrapped up in myself and my deep attachment to Revenge, I committed one of the worst friendship crimes ever. I told my best friend everything that happened in the season finale.

Yip. Mm-hm. Ja, ja. I deserve everything you're saying or thinking about me right now. There is no excuse.

I read a conversation that my almost-former bestie and I had had about the show the previous day as a sign that she had already watched the episode. I had it in my head that she was just waiting for me to weigh in. So when the final credits rolled, I immediately sent her a series of emoji-laden messages, detailing my reaction to all the most crucial moments.

What I got in response was not pretty.

Oh, the pain that can be inflicted with a colon and a bracket

I had ruined her life. Basically.

I proceeded to apologise profusely, begging for forgiveness and using lots of dramatic imagery.

I could not believe what I had done! The two of us usually discuss these things together. It's what makes watching these shows worth it in the first place. I felt like we could never go back to the way things were.

And it's such a stupid mistake. I was so taken by the drama* of Revenge that I forgot basic Friends who Watch Series Together etiquette. While I gushed about the plot twists and the script writing, I was losing my status as a friend. Just, all of the street cred - all of it - gone!

I never understood why people were so touchy about spoilers.

I feel ya, Mindy

But I can see clearly now. Spoilers deprive people of the joy of experiencing the greatness of an episode of their favourite TV show for themselves. And really, how can anyone justify being a thief of joy?
I certainly can't. And I was an accidental, remorseful thief.

This might be because I am just this type of person, but I just could stop thinking about how badly I had behaved. I was convinced that there was no coming back from this. I genuinely worried about the state of our friendship.

North had to be brought into this. North West.

After my friend said she forgave me (in a message which I felt had heavy undertones of scorn and resentment) I attempted to carry on, (almost) like nothing ever happened. But I couldn't. I felt like there was a wall between us.

I had to make some sort of peace offering. If I could, I would go back in time and un-send those messages, but since I am not a time-travelling mad scientist I did the next best thing.

I lay all my cards out, and admitted how foolish I felt, hoping to be let back in.

And it worked!

Tentatively, but enthusiastically, I carried on a Normal Conversation.
I still wanted to make some type of grand gesture, so I made good on my promise and wrote this.

There are a few lessons I learnt here.

1:  Never - as in ever - assume that your friend has watched the most recent episode of a series.
2:  After a particularly emotional episode of a beloved series, STAY AWAY FROM WHATSAPP. The emojis are not good for someone in a fragile state.
3:  Don't take your friends' love for granted.
There is too much history between me and said friend for an episode of a melodramatic TV show to estrange us forever. However, what is important is that I got a little insight into how horrible it would be if I ever did something to seriously betray her trust. It would be unbearable.
I would never do anything like that anyway - but now I am just extra-extra sure.

And that's the story of how I almost-but-not-really lost a friend because of my commitment to a TV show and my eagerness to share every detail of my life over WhatsApp.

*Seriously, though, this episode was intense. It's not that I didn't mean what I said in the messages - I just wish I had had better timing.
** "works" = crude translation of imisebenzi or mintirho, which are important traditional cleansing ceremonies, arranged in order to fix the path of an individual's life; usually involving ancestors, visits from extended family, the slaughtering of cows/sheep, and other such details.


  1. :''D You are just too much! Just the thing I needed to put some excitement into my day. I love this post. Non-series watchers will never get it.
    When is Jane coming back?


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